Off to Drink the Kool Aid...

Vizhnitz. Rachmatrisvka. Krasne. Kloisenberg. Boyan. Satmar. Pupa. Mosheelee. Belz.

These, in chronological order of when they were spotted, were only some of the "dynasties" responsible for the school bus frenzy that I witnessed this morning during my search for a suitable parking spot for alternate-side parking day.

Bleary-eyed, irate, vested hunkie bus drivers in their 20s and 30s, frustrated at the occupational plight to which they are resigned (as a result of their own schooling in one or another of the above-mentioned institutions) leaned on their horns with literally non-stop honking, while battling pedestrians, drivers, firefighters - and one another - for precious rush-hour space along 12th Ave and its periphery.

I can hardly wrap my mind around the fact that thousands of children are being bussed around BP on a daily basis, to and from schools that are mostly within walking distance of their homes. What is even more troubling is that the schools serve no purpose other than to indoctrinate innocent children with mental (and physical, of course) molestation, lies and total submission to individual fiefdoms. That there is virtually no English language instruction or any form of secular education being offered is the ultimate fraud to local taxpayers and even more so to the child victims and all Jews for that matter.

When I was forced to come to a sudden stop in middle of a one way block - for the third time - while waiting for an unnamed school bus (Pupov maybe?) diagonally thrown across the street with its blinking stop sign making room for the 20-year-old, brown-seamed-stockinged, turban-wearing mother of two, it suddenly hit me – Gerrer girls school happens to be very good.“They teach math!”

Chunka in the Ir Habira

Washington, DC - President George W. Bush recognized the importance of Bobov, Buhosh, Veretzky, and Veyaipol and their relationship to the miracle of Chanuka


The story of Hanukkah recalls the miraculous victory of a small band of patriots against tyranny, and the oil that burned for eight nights, Bush said in welcoming about 70 guests to the White House reception for the holiday, which begins at sundown on Dec. 21. The highlight of the event was the "fressing" of the "vintage keegel" because this truly shows our "hakaras hatoiv" to oil. 

Hanukkah commemorates the Jews' successful rebellion against suppression of their religion under the Syrian-Greek empire in 165 B.C.E. Led by the Maccabee family, the Jews drove the Greeks from Jerusalem and reclaimed the Jerusalem Temple for religious services.

Bush compared the Maccabee's victory with the founding of Kiryas Yoel, The Yarche Kallah program in Lakewood, The Skever Mikvah, and the Mirrer Shiur Klali, which he called " incredible miraculous victories."

"When the Skulya Dayan's Shviger led the world in recognizing the importance of Kiryas Joel in May of 1971, many wondered whether the small but competitive, earth conscious bastion of highly educated village members could possibly survive," Bush said.

In honor of this event, the reception featured the "fressing" of the "vintage keegel" commissioned by Harav Chatzkel Bunim Noyach, the first admor of Seret-Bushtyn and given to President Nixon in 1971. The grandsons maggid shiur of these two leaders, Admor M'Seret-Bushtyn Shlita and Bob Nixon, ate the keegel together.

After the fressing, The Handsome Rebbe gave an inspirational speech on the importance of being a good neighbor and more accepting of peoples flaws.

Tosher Hoise Buchir, Tsanzer Rebbetzin, and Veretzky Shamish were in attendance.

Puppa+Bobov=Pupov

In a stunning and brilliant display of achdus, the Bobover and Pupa dynasties have announced a merger that experts (including the editors of Kol Haolam Kulo and Yeshiva World) say will allow them to pool their resources to create the largest vehicle of goodwill that Judaism has ever seen.

Since the awful Mumbai tragedy, the Bobover and Pupa dayanim have been holding secret meetings in order to figure out a way to help Jews worldwide. Ironically, the merger was at the suggestion of the Vizhnitzer Rebbetzin's nephew (who happens to know the Handsome Rabbi) who uses the same mikvah as the Pupa Dayan's shver.

"Pupov" will be the ultimate Jewish organization that will more efficiently utilize the charitable infrastructure that already exists within the respective dynasties, which include:

Respected Universities
Community Job Training Programs
Outreach Centers
24-hour Helplines
Counseling Centers
Health Awareness Programs
Literacy Promotion
Hug-Your-neighbor Campaigns
Home bound and Eldery visiting groups
Support Israel Campaigns

The Bushtyn Dynasty was said to be so impressed with the merger that it is preparing a special announcement of its own. Stay tuned.

Mi Kiamcha Yisroouel